This maybe why Mandela is right - our biggest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. The more powerful we are - the more challenges we can survive.

It's a fine line between weakness- of not believing you can handle a certain situation when it comes and strength- of wanting something, that you do not entertain the thought of something happening that's not within your control.

It's a delicate line to cross and somehow, I have most often than not - made it. Wanting things to happen my way - to making it happen my way has become a quarterly challenge - a swift siesta in the land of limbo - but eventually, I know the universe will give me a break.

Because things - just has to, has to, has to, HAS TO - work out.

I sometimes categorize people when I meet them according to their luck in life. There are people that things just happen to - naturally, luckily. Things have always been so easy for them and the little challenges that they face in their lives somehow doesn't manifest in their seemingly happy, easy life. They win the lottery, they live in a great house, they have a good family and they live happily ever after.

The biggest tragedy they could ever face is probably the donation of their childhood toys- luck they have, would not even let their white sneakers step on a piece of gum.

There are also those people who doesn't seem to have luck in their lives at all. That every little good thing that happens to them seem to generate into an exchange for a big disaster. In this case, if they had a good day - they would have three seemingly bad days to tip the balance to a regular.

I sometimes believe that I am a cross between these.

My seemingly bittersweet life has experienced both downfall and bliss and there are those rare times I am caught in between. Change in my life has always been crazy and unconventional. And the jumping off point is not always within a place of comfort.

But it always draws curiosity of certain possibilities.

If what they say is true, that your life is brought about your choices and wanting to tread on the mill of making it happen - then perhaps you can.

Perhaps you can transition into those lucky ones and make all the negative circumstances go away. Perhaps, when people tell you that you will only come out stronger when shit happens is when they have come upon to realize that they have found a way to have shit not come into their lives anymore.

That they have discovered a way to block off unwanted circumstances.

Perhaps.

So this is when I play with destiny. This is when I hope and pray and summon the universe to make things happen my way.Give me a break cosmic muffin.